‘ . . . Another day clean’: Culinary school offers hope, positivity

January 30, 2025

During class in our Milford Culinary School, Kelly appears calm and focused on the task at hand. What her demeanor doesn’t reveal is the trauma, the turmoil, the terror, and the challenges she’s faced and overcome. “I’m in recovery, and this is one of the best choices I ever made,” she said, but she doesn’t mind talking about some of the not-so-positives ones. “I am happy to tell my story if it helps someone else.”

She learned about the Food Bank of Delaware’s Culinary School program at an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. The Culinary School is a 14-week workforce development training by chefs in a professional kitchen and includes a two-week paid internship. “I love cooking, but I thought ain’t nothing in life that’s free, so I researched it,” she said. It is free to attend.

And for once, she was in the right place at the right time.

A Pennsylvania native, her arrival in Delaware is tied to her addictions and subsequent recovery progress through Impact Life, a peer-led recovery and harm-reduction program with residences and services stateside. Kelly spent nearly a year at The Sanctuary, the Impact Life farm in the Seaford area. “I started recovery taking care of animals . . . goats, chickens, alpacas. Three acres surrounded by cornfields. If I wanted to leave, I wouldn’t have known which way to go,” she said.

She now lives in a local Impact Life-owned step-down — or transition — house. “I love it here. I couldn’t have done any of this if I were still at the farm,” Kelly added.

Kelly lists the trauma she’s experienced: co-dependency issues with her parents, the death of her 4-day old son due to domestic violence; the two rods and 21 screws in her spine – also the result of that domestic violence incident. “I was thrown out a window when I was eight months pregnant. But when I was growing up, I had no wants or needs. My father had three restaurants and a catering business. He died when I was nine. I want to put my cooking skills to use and follow my dad’s dream, and I want to make my mom proud. She’s 76 now and has had two heart attacks,” she said.

She’s quick to note that thanks to support and her own efforts, her focus has shifted from pot smoking and alcohol. “Today, I choose me. I’m 14 months clean, and that’s the longest since I’ve been alive – 45 years.”

Her husband – the man who pushed her out the window – is serving a 15 to 30-year sentence in a state prison. “I got sentenced 2 ½ to 5 years when I was 18 – selling drugs in high school. Back then, I wanted to be a hairdresser, but I had a fear of test-taking. I did the school, but I never did the boards. I’ve been on probation or parole since 1998, until I completed that in 2023,” Kelly said.

Last December, she was offered a job in Indiana – coincidentally around the time of her late son’s birthday and death dates. But fortune was not in her favor this time either. “I got carjacked and kidnapped into a sex trafficking ring.” Her captors – one of whom was ultimately arrested — repeatedly injected her with opioids and raped her until she was able to escape.

“That’s what drove me to rehab. I know if I didn’t I would kill myself. I knew I couldn’t go home. On New Year’s Eve, I went into the rehab. At the farm, I completely shut down for two months, but now I’m able to tell my story to anyone I think it will help.”

Fortunately, things have been looking up for Kelly. “I’ve been put down my entire life, people telling me I’m a loser, but I finally had a parole officer who believed in me. She got me into an Impact Life recovery house, the farm out in the country. When I decided it’s my time to go to rehab, that was it.”

Rehab requires daily commitments, therapy and meetings that support a goal of maintaining sobriety. “I have trauma therapy every Monday. I go to either NA or AA seven days a week, and church every Sunday. I keep busy so my mind doesn’t wander. I keep doing the next right thing. For me, it’s another day clean.”

And she’s found that her faith – putting her trust in God – has been key. “Every morning, I get down on my knees, and I pray every day. I give Him my all. This is my second time in recovery, and now I’m passing the year mark. Some days, it’s not one day at a time, it’s one second at a time,” Kelly said.

Taking a break from her kitchen duties, she reflects on her current situation. “I love it here. It’s what I want to do. It’s enjoyable. It is filling in the blanks for me. Chef Tish is so knowledgeable, and she wants you to be the best you can be. This is the icing on the cake. Now I’m ready to ice cakes. I have a goal: to have a food truck that sells savory cupcakes, not the sweet ones. I plan to stay in Delaware; I have plans.”